The Beginning

On January 9 2013  i went to the labor and delivery at 31 weeks pregnant with my baby boy Rayden cause i was having back pains and i had not felt him move in bout 2 weeks, and i just had that feeling that something was not right, when i got to the labor and delivery they started to monitor the baby his heart rate kept dropping off while they were monitoring him inside so they sent me for an ultrasound, and that is when i found out my baby boy was not okay he had a lot of swelling and a lot of extra fluid in his lungs, chest, around his heart, and in his abdomen and his head. He has very sever hydrops:( and he also has a big mass where one of his lungs should be. so they life flighted me to the university hospital in SLC, not to mention my husband was not here and i could not get a hold of him to get this information to him cause he was in a special training for the army so i had to contact red cross to get him home and let him know what was going on. the next day my husband flew into SLC from his training right in time he arrived at the hospital at about 5pm and rayden was born by emergency c section at 6:30 pm on January 10 2013, they took him right away to the NICU i did not get to see him, when he came out they had to get his heart started again cause it had stopped and they had to get him on a breathing machine and everything right away. he was born ten weeks early and he weighed 9lbs 3 oz cause of how much fluid he had all over him. I was not able to see him until later that night around 10pm when i got my feeling back in my legs, when i saw him for the first time it was a shock he was so big filled with all this fluid he was so swollen he didint even look like s baby i was still in shock cause everything had happened so fast i was still in denial that this was happening to us, and i still am in a way and all i do is ask WHY? why does he have to go threw all this pain, i feel so hopeless and bad there is nothing i can do for him to get better, i just have to sit there and hope that everyone in the hospital is doing all they can to help him it is out of my hands now. i am still in shock and don't know what to do or think. all we can do is be here for him and think positive!