holding him and new head information.

well as a lot of you know i got to hold Rayden for the first time last night it was amazing, so worth the wait. it was really scary at first cause of how many people had to be there to get him situated just so i could hold him and as they picked him up to hand him to me his heart rate dropped really bad but once he was in my arms and he was comfortable his heart rate was actually better then it was before, it was amazing.... when i walked in his new room for the first time cause they moved him while i was gone i could hardly even recognize him he looks so much better every part of his body looks good he weights 5lbs 9 oz now so he has lost a lot of fluid he is so small and cute and perfect i just love him so much. the nurse finally told me she thinks he is past that hump and that he is going to make it, now we just have to worry about what the long term problems will be, i am so happy. also one thing that scared me when i saw him is that the top of his head seems so big but it is because of all that fluid build up in is head, its scary i hope they do something about it soon cause i don't want it to cause him anymore problems then he already has, but he also has an infection and they said they can not do anything further until his infection is under control i hope it gets under control soon though, they are going to put either a tube in or a permanent shunt in that he will have for the rest of his life but they are still discussing it. they also said that they might be able to transfer him to saint george NICU soon after he gets his head stuff under control. if they put in the tube they want him to stay up here for a while so that they can test it and make sure it is draining properly just in case they would have to move to a shunt. i don't know but i hope they figure it out soon him being in STG would be 100 time easier.

i love him so much and i cant wait to bring him home one day!